They fear they aren’t interesting and will bore their date, hence make a fool of themselves. But let me tell you something: it’s just thoughts, and your thoughts aren’t facts.
The fear is real, I get that, I’ve felt it many times!
First dates can be exciting and awesome, but they can also be nerve-wracking, awkward, and pretty flippin’ weird.
If you’re anything like me, the conversation will invariably turn to boring work stories and how much you’re addicted to guacamole.
As a coach I listen a lot more than I talk, it’s the nature of what I do.
Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. What are your favorite books, TV shows, movies and music? If you met your partner through an online dating service, what would you tell your friends and family when they asked where you met? what is it that you really care about/can't live without?
w=1024" class="wp-image-346491 size-full" src="https://scstylecaster.files.wordpress.com/2015/03/crazy-stupid-love-movie-image-ryan-gosling-emma-stone-02.jpg? w=1024&h=683" alt="first date questions" width="1024" height="683" srcset="https://scstylecaster.files.wordpress.com/2015/03/crazy-stupid-love-movie-image-ryan-gosling-emma-stone-02.jpg? Have you traveled anywhere cool lately/do you have any trips coming up? Some of these questions may seem silly at first, but they can be very telling.
A foolproof way to ensure that conversation will always be flowing is to simply your date things, although—given the fact that we never know how comfortable others are with casual conversation—that might be easier said than done. Where exactly do you live in [insert your city or town here]? Questions over the first drink should be an equal mix of inquisitive and casual, and should allow you to start gauging his or her true personality.
Childhood memories are funny things: They reveal a lot about the way you think about the world, and the way you looked at it from a young age. As long as you’ve got a couple years to cushion you from it, it can be a time that’s rich with funny stories and little observations. What’s something you’ve been really proud of lately? Eating that super-hot chili on the “Dare You” menu at the local diner? If you’re going out together, it’s fair to assume that you and your date are both in the dating game. For me, it would be my photo albums and my childhood stuffed animal, but their question will tell you what they could not bear to lose. The goal of dates is to have a good time and figure out if you want to see more of this person.
It’s a great way to learn a little bit more about their background and spark a discussion about the way you both grew up. You want to know where someone came from, but it can be a delicate subject. The way that someone saw themselves in high school when they were can say a lot about who they are. Maybe it’s hitting a time goal on a run or learning how to make pesto or finally getting the hang of something at work. If reading is something you’re into, this is a good way of seeing what tastes you share and what interests your date. It’s a good way to take a peek into their ambitions and dreams. It’s a weird one, and it helps to commiserate over it. Hopefully some of these questions will help you on your way.