If you’ve been sober for some time and are looking to get back out in the dating world, there are a few words of advice that can help along the way.
There is no reason to let past relationships riddled with codependency issues, emotional abuse, and deception prevent you from starting over fresh now that you’ve cleaned up.
But before you put yourself in a position to fall for an addict, there are a few things you need to know: For anyone considering dating an active addict, it is important to realize that love cannot conquer addiction.
Addiction takes priority over everything – you, children, career, financial security, even one’s own freedom.
Too often, recovering alcoholics and addicts find themselves in codependent relationships that lack healthy communication, goal setting, and problem solving.
Because of the psychological problems that are a root cause for abusing drugs and alcohol, these issues transfer onto our marriages, relationships, and friendships.
Relationships can be part of healing, but finding healthy partners who support your recovery is a challenge.
Are they actively working a program of recovery (e.g., participating in self-help support meetings, counseling or an aftercare program)?
In the early months of recovery, you’ve given up a lot — your go-to coping strategy, your social network, your approach to life.
It’s natural to look to the comfort of new love to counteract the loneliness.
Tatkin has seen many online dating success stories.
But, like other ways of meeting someone, he says it’s a “roll of the dice.” It’s important to carefully vet a prospective mate and avoid feeling too familiar too quickly.